oh

Happy Halloween!

This is the pumpkin I carved on Sunday during the "pumpkin carving party" (mama C and papa R - you know why I'm using quotes). I freestyled! No patterns, just my imagination. Check out the nose! It's in honor of baby V :) I know, so thoughtful....

Last Man Standing

I'm the last man standing here at the SD. I kinda like being the last one out. I get more done that way. Actually, if I could, I'd change my hours to 11:30 to 7:30. I heard this from someone last night and it sounded good to me.

So about last night...

I was supposed to go to the Botanical Gardens with mama C, papa R, and J+R, but I fucked up at work (and didn't find out I'd fucked up until 6:00pm when I should have been leaving) so I missed the Festival of Ale and Scarecrows in the Garden. oh well. womp.womp.

I did manage to meet up with them at Top Flr (no I didn't misspell it). It's down the street from mama C and papa R's place. They've been several times and always raved about it to me, so when we were carving pumpkins on Sunday and they suggested we go for J's birthday, I was IN! Note: When I say we carved pumpkins, I mean me, because I'm the only one that managed to clean out my pumpkin and put a face on it.

Unfortunately for papa R, who recently had some pins and a plate put into his broken ankle, Top Flr really is on the top floor. It's a climb - and I'm not even on crutches! I wouldn't say the climb was worth it, but it was decent.

We started off with the lamb skewers, cheese plate and hummus. The lamb skewers were dreamy and the hummus was fantastic (even the break its served with). The cheese plate was meh. I ordered an arugula salad (peaches, some sort of shaved hard cheese and toasted almonds) and a shrimp/cheese ravioli entree. The arugula salad was one of two that I could have ordered. Luckily, R ordered the other one. I liked hers better. Mine was too bitter for my taste, but I guess that's what I get for ordering an arugula salad. Papa R commented that the peaches tasted more like apple. I didn't agree, but they were really hard. I could have eaten an entire plate of those roasted almonds.

I have been trying to break away from my meat standard when I go out to eat, but I think I need to go back to what I know. At FAB I ordered fish (swordfish I think) and I was not impressed. The shrimp and ravioli dish at Top Flr wasn't impressive either. The shrimp was too fishy. I know you're supposed to taste seafood when you bite into something that came out of the sea, but it was overpowering. Do you know what I mean? No? Ok, maybe it's just me. I could have eaten the shrimp all night if that's all I'd ordered. It was okay on its own. Just like the ravioli. Great on it's own, just not mixed with the fish. Anyway, I kinda frowned at it after I took my first bite, so papa R graciously offered to switch dishes with me for a little so I could try my second choice order, the duck confit pasta. Much better. When papa R and I swapped bowls back, there wasn't much left. Guess he liked it.

I shouldn't have had dessert, but I was already out. My theory is, if you are already out stuffing your face, why not go all the way? Oh I went for it. I ordered the ice cream sandwich. So when you think of an ice cream sandwich, don't you think of smooth vanilla ice cream between two squishy rectangles of chocolate goodness? I do. So when a cookie, only slightly bigger than an oreo, came out with leaky/liquidy chocolate ice cream slapped int the center, I was bummed. You can't gourmet up an ice cream sandwich. You just can't.

Overall, 2.5 stars out of 5. Five being "I will die unhappy if I never eat here again".

these crack me up

good morning little bug

:)

easy, Dr. Nancy Snyderman

I watch The Today Show every morning from 8am to about 8:45am when I grudgingly make my way out the door to work. I could watch The Today Show all day. There are some correspondents I could do without. Mainly Anne Curry, Tiki Barber (WTF? Tiki Barber?!) and Luke Russert (I'm sorry, you're probably not supposed to say that, but c'mon. He had no real experience before reporting on The Today Show. It shows). I've never had a problem with the health correspondent, Dr. Nancy Snyderman. Until today.

She did a segment on the inventor of the rotavirus vaccine. I thought the purpose of the segment was to give pro-vaccination a voice. But the doctor took it too far. After the segment was done and Matt Lauer tried to go to commercial by saying something like thanks for reporting on that controversial issue, Dr. Nancy Snyderman went batshit crazy.

"NO ITS NOT CONTROVERSIAL"
Matt: "Well....for some parents it is"
"NOT IT IS NOT"

This continued for several seconds. We get it, you are pro-vaccination.

To vaccinate or not vaccinate? I'm kind of on the fence.
The main controversy behind the question is whether or not vaccinations lead to autism, but the main reason I'm on the fence is that I think we tend to over-sterilize, over-sanitize, over-vaccinate.

I found out today six different vaccinations are given between the time a child is born and 6 months. One each for:
Hepatitis B
Polio
Pneumococcal Disease
Diphtheria, Tetanus & Pertussis
Rotavirus
Hib
I'm not sure all these are necessary, especially given that at least two of them are new since I was last vaccinated. I'm sure super-annoying Jenny McCarthy would tell me my kid doesn't need any of them.

Anyway, this plus several other things lately make me think I don't want to have children. I am not saying you shouldn't have kids either, its a personal choice, but I just don't think I want one. For me, not having a child at all would mean I didn't need to get vaccinations for diseases that might make my child deathly ill. Not having a child would mean not contributing to over population. And finally not having a child would mean I'd spare my spawn from all the suck things that tend to happen in life.

I know this is the ultra cynical way of looking at things. I know there is a flipside, but to me, maybe the flipside is too much to be responsible for and maybe I'd be better off with a dog or a hamster for that matter.

STFU

if you don't know what that means, i'll tell you.
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
so i'm officially over this campaign season. OVER. DONE.
I've always held the belief that one's choice of political belief is personal. I hope I've never been one of these people that forces my political beliefs down your throat. but if you are my friend, you likely know who i'm going to vote for and because we are friends and likely of similar mindsets, we are likely voting for the same candidate. i hope that i have never been all OBAMA OBAMA OBAMA on your ass, because i'm not that person. The items I post on Facebook or on my blog are firstly (for me) entertaining and then political. Like today for instance. If you got the "Obama Loss Blamed on (Your Name Here)" email its not because I NEED you to vote Obama. Its because I thought it was funny. I don't care if you vote for McCain. Or your mom for that matter. I just want you to vote. It's important. Not many of the world's citizens enjoy democracy. It's a right. Respect it. I'll never try to force my opinion on you, but I will be one of these that reminds you how good you have it (even when you don't think it) as a citizen of the United States of America.

I AM SO FUCKING BORED

i don't know what it is, but this past week at work has been PAINFUL.
i am so fucking bored i could die.

in other news, i have been eating polly-o string cheese nonstop since i bought it on sunday. i think i've had 6 sticks since then. its just so good.

baby granmama drama

so i mentioned baby v didn't come into the world without some drama. you be the judge:

On Saturday, around 7pm, my mom calls me crying.
Let me make something clear from the start, my mom doesn't cry. It's not like I've only seen my mother cry a handful of times (there was drama growing up), but it always breaks my heart. It makes me cry. Usually, I just happen to be in the same place when she starts crying, but for her to call me and cry - that is red alert crisis level - so you have to listen. She said she was in the park walking around because my sister, her husband (L) and their midwife had kicked her out of the bathroom (in an at-home birthy, you deliver in the bathroom. gross). Now I'm used to my mother blowing things way out of proportion, but I wanted to understand why she was crying, so I prepared myself for a story.

She said that L's parents were not told when V went into labor like our family and friends were because they do not approve of their choice to deliver at home with no drugs and a midwife. I can't say that I disagree with this particular opinion, especially with a first child. It's just that so many things could go wrong. I'd want a hospital.

Anyways, she says they vehemently opposed the idea, so they were going to be told when baby V was born, not when V was in labor. I said "oookay". She continued by saying she had been supportive of them. She hadn't planned on being in Arizona when V went into labor, but was glad to help. She didn't agree with what they were doing, but never articulated the sentiment. Again, I said "oookay"...my mother has this way of going off topic...she said she would have kept her mouth shut (here it comes, I thought) if the labor wasn't nearing 48 hours, but V was in extreme pain. I said "Mom, she chose the hard way", but my mom, being the mother she is, wasn't going to watch her daughter in excruciating pain for 36 or so hours and getting worse without saying something.So she says that when the midwife was making conversation with her, she said something like "I can't support this" (this meaning an at-home birth with no drugs)" they turned on her, told her to go away and slammed the bathroom door in her face. That's her story and I'm sure something like that went down, but I know how nagging my mom can be and how stubborn my sister can be, so I just nodded and agreed and try to soothe.

So there's my mom, on the phone with me crying, at a park in Arizona. There really isn't a whole lot you can do in situations like this. I was mad at my sister and L for making her cry, but I mean, my sister is in labor and I know how I am when I hurt. I don't want anyone talking to me, least of all telling me what I'm doing is wrong. Actually, I bet I probably would have been meaner. My sister isn't much of a yeller, but you know I would have been like "GET. THE. FUCK. OUT!". I knew the last thing they intended to do was to offend my mother, but they are so concentrated on the birth of their first child they aren't going to notice how what they say and do is going to affect grandma. I mean really. They just want the nagging voice to leave them alone. I told my mom to relax. Breathe. She was ready to head to the airport. She was being really indignant saying things like "WELL! they don't want me here. What am I doing here! I'm leaving!" and I had to be like "don't be like that. are you listening to yourself? leave if you want, but don't do it out of anger or because you think your leaving will teach them some sort of lesson. this day is not about you". I told her to go back to the house and hangout. Take a nap or something. I knew she wouldn't and couldn't do this, but it was worth a shot. Thirty minutes later she called me again. I rolled my eyes.

She was in hysterics. "Why?! Why do they insist on going through with this stupid idea?! She can die! She is in so much pain! SHE CAN DIE! Why don't they call an ambulance!?!" I knew she'd probably busted back into the bathroom and saw my sister probably looking like she was going to pass out from the pain and couldn't stand it. At this point, we were beyond the point of testing my patience. So of course I start yelling "STOP IT! STOP! CALM DOWN. RELAX. They chose this. You have to live with it. This is not your choice. Ok?! The midwife will call an ambulance if she thinks something is wrong (they have to do this).STOP." She catches her breath and starts babbling again. So I'm like, "I can't talk to you right now. I have things to do. Call me when the baby is born, okay? It will be fine. Just calm down." Ten minutes later my phone rings again and I'm ready to throw it across the room before even looking at who it is, but I do and its J.

"ITS A GIRL!"

I call my mom and tell her thinking she's still out in the park.

"I know. They came out and got me. I'm cleaning her up right now"

Of course you are, mom.

SHE'S HERE

Victoria Ryan (baby V, or maybe Victori, to me) was born on October 25, 2008 at 4:35pm. She came in at a whopping 9lbs!

As is normal with our family, she didn't come without drama. Tell y'all all about it tomorrow. For now, say hello to baby V!

SHE'S COMING

my sister has been in labor since she IMed me yesterday morning. her contractions were 5-7 minutes apart last night. this morning when i got up, i called my mom. no baby yet.

i have been reading* this book called Growing Up Digital. The fact that my sister IMed me yesterday about going into labor and I text messaged my sister for an update this morning and i thought to update my Facebook status about it last night and today proves the authors' overall point. Things for children growing up in the digital age will be so dramatically different than they were when we were little. Think about it - where did your electronic footprint begin? Likely way after you started school. These little ones? Well, how many sonograms on Facebook have you seen?

anyway, safe travels, baby V. We will see you soon! :)
xoxo
auntie L

*when i say "reading" i mean i started reading a book in earnest awhile ago and made it a decent way through and gave up - this happens a lot

i want some of your brown sugar

unbenownst to me, d'angelo recently put out a single.
let me be clear about d'angelo. he's the fucking hotness.
you guys know i've never dated in my race. i don't normally find anydudes other than white dudes attractive. i don't know why this is. seriously. i know people think this is weird.
d'angelo is probably the first black man i have found attractive.
i'm in love with a thug:

Reckoner Remix

I found this site by way of the Them Jeans band site on MySpace.
It is so amazing what people can do with sound. Blows me away.
http://www.radioheadremix.com/

influenza

i'm pretty sure i have the flu.
i'm not sure how i didn't come to this conclusion earlier, considering i hung out in hospitals (plural) all day tuesday. yesterday, around 5:00pm, i started getting the chills and my legs (bones, really) started to ache. i went home, took a shot of nyquil and got into bed, but i couldn't sleep. i just laid there tossing and turning. i did finally manage to go to sleep hours later, maybe it was minutes - you never know with nyquil - everything becomes foggy. i do know i was freezing the whole night. i didn't want to get out of bed to pee. but i did.

hospital tour

yesterday was a very medical day for me.
i woke up and went to my annual gynecological exam. back when i was a hypochondriac, i was there every month getting myself tested for STDs and asking them "does this seem strange to you?", now I only see them once a year when i need to get my birth control refilled. Its not as though they knew me back then and the conversations were easier, but yesterday was struggle city. the woman that weighs me, makes me pee in a cup and pokes me to draw blood for an iron test is the same lady that has done that to me for years. doesn't recognize me. in fact, i don't think she looked at me once yesterday. the conversation consisted of "go here, step here, pee there, come here, put this on". there wasn't even a thank you. then the nurse practicioner came in (whom i've been seeing for the past several years now because my doctor is too good for me) and it was more of the same awkward. i knew she was going to pull the "anything cool over the past year?" bullshit on me (this is her favorite question everytime i come in) and i'm like....eh... and then i throw out "napa" and she latches on to that asking me question after question while she's down there examining the vajayjay. how the hell am i supposed to make meaningful conversation when there is something like this inside me?
I'M SORRY! I HAD TO!
the whole thing took 10 minutes and i was out and on my way to northside hospital to go sit with mama C for a couple of hours while papa R was having ankle surgery.
here's another thing - why do hospitals charge for parking? seriously?! have you seen your last doctor's bill from a doctor that practices from inside the hospital? its CRAZY? do they really need my $5 per half hour??!!
i left right around the time papa R was getting out, so C asked if she could borrow my car. I gladly gave it up to her, but then realized, i was headed to my dentist (off the highway) and you know i'm not comfortable in my own car...this was going to be interesting. so down 400 and back up 85 i went to see my dental hygenist (because again, my real dentist, the one with the medical degree is now too good to see me). sweet. no cavities, but that shit hurt. in fact, every time i go, i swear i can move my lower four front teeth around with my tongue. creepy.

that smell

so i was just in the bathroom. there was a lady in there that smelled of wet clothes that had sat in a dryer for days. you know what i'm talking about. i've smelled people like that at the gym and in the grocery store. my thing is, you can smell that on you! why not spare the rest of us your stank?

so last night, K, L & I went to FAB on Ivan Allen in Downtown. I was excited the whole day for this - I'd heard good things, but I was disappointed. Only 2 stars from me. Here's why:

1) I got there before the other girls and I sat at the bar. The bartender came over to me happily plopping a menu and napkin down in front of me. I hate this. Most people that hang out at the bar are waiting - so quit trying to rush me into an order. When I told him I was "just waiting" he gave me serious 'tude.
2) Our waiter was "slow" and I mean that in the special way, not the speed way. The man was just awkward, forgetting orders we'd just given him minutes before (having to ask us again what we ordered) and he forgot one of my orders all together. If he was new there, then I understand, but for the sake of your tip, tell me that.
3) the food was okay. nothing to write home about. in fact, my swordfish was kinda dry and the sauce that accompanied my pilaf and mushrooms was so overpowering and there was so much of it. i'm still kinda feeling the after effects. my stomach did not like FAB.

so that was that. i think the dessert was the best part. apple galette (french for fancily laid out apples) and caramel ice cream. honestly, i probably could have just eaten that all night.

we went to K's aftewards to enjoy GG (which i'd already seen, but GG is like SATC, you can watch it over and over again. GG is magical!) and wine. i went home shortly after watching GG because i was beat from my day of doing nothing.

date night with L

i woke up this morning knowing i had to do laundry. the usual piles here and there had turned into mountains. gross. so when i woke up naturally at 7:30, i took a shower and headed out the door to do some laundry at my favorite spot. i was out of there an hour later, put away my clothes and headed up to the atlantic station La Fitnesse (this is how i say it, so this is how i spell it. it's really L.A. Fitness) for the 11am kickboxing class.
i used to follow this one kickboxing instructor around to two different La Fitnesse's and one day he disappeared. Kickboxing classes haven't been the same since. Kinda like Keiko back in Burke at Burke Racquet (remember, M?). Once you find an instructor you like, it breaks your heart (seriously) when they leave you. i didn't reunite with my favorite instructor today, but the instructor today wasn't too bad...but i have to say something and i'm in no position to say any of this given that i am probably just as jiggly if not more so...
lately, my dance and fitness instructors have been on the heavy side. i mean if these ladies did the class they are making us do on a regular basis, they would have bangin' bodies, but most of these ladies have been looking kinda heavy. i don't understand. i want to be inspired. these ladies haven't inspired me. anyway!
so after kickboxing (which kicked my ass), i went to publix, went to sell some clothes at Rag O'Rama in L5P (sold a whopping $20 worth), came home, made lunch and took a nap. Got back up an hour later to get ready to meet L for movie and dinner.
I'd suggested we see The Secret Life of Bees. IT WAS AWESOME. YOU MUST SEE THIS MOVIE! i will warn you, though, that you should not see this movie with someone you are not comfortable crying in front of. you do a lot of crying. some parts are crazy heart-wrenching, but so poignant. watch this movie! you will not regret it.
after the movie, L humored me and walked around with me because i thought i was finally going to plunk down some serious money for a new bag. i have been threatening to buy my botkier for awhile now. i really thought i was going to buy it today, but in the end i didn't. i just couldn't pull the trigger. :( i want a nice purse, but i can't justify $600 when things around me are so uncertain. i just can't.
we went to beleza for dinner after the movie. i know you love this place, L and i think parts of it were good, but healthy food is not my style. hahahaha! i mean if i liked to eat healthily when i went out, i probably wouldn't look like this. eh. i will say the drinks are fabulous. i can't remember what the name of our drink was, but it had muscodines, cava and vodka. very good. we shared quinoa (decent), salad, tuna (probably would have been better for me if both hadn't contained beets. hate beets) and shrimp in coconut sauce with basmati rice. we also shared a pumpkin and chocolate tart. this sounds like a lot for two people, but the way everything is prepared at beleza and the portion size (which i'm sure is probably the perfect amount), just wasn't my style of eating. again, when i go out, i want a meal. going out for me (should be) a treat - so i want um, heartier. i had a good time chatting with L, like i always do, but i probably won't go back to beleza.
afterwards, we ducked into chocolate pink (dessert spot) because i'd never been. i didn't buy anything else to eat, but did manage to slather on one of the sample lotions in the front. i think it was "buttercream" flavored. all i know is i can still smell it on me now and i may want to eat me.
we ended the night in front of CVS. L, like she always does and i love her for it, gave me a bunch of her magazines. can't wait to dress myself in fleece (it is freezing here tonight) and read them. she also sold me her camera, so expect to see more "anonymous" pictures of me and my debauchery. anyway, thanks L! you are the best!

the lesbian and the dancing poet

my flight home from napa/san francisco was worth mentioning and i hadn't written about it yet. so....
i mentioned i came back to the hotel after the wedding completely exhausted. i maybe had half a glass of champagne and half a glass of red wine. my body just doesn't want to take in alcohol anymore, which i guess is a good thing considering it doesn't do much for my figure.... i went to bed and got up at 6am so that when A came to pick me up in the morning, i'd be ready.
A is one of Ir's oldest friends. I like him, but he needs to be babysat (he didn't know many people at the wedding) and i didn't take the trip to babysit someone i hardly knew. now granted, i am totally grateful for him driving - because you all know i can't do the highway thing - but having to handhold someone through multiple social events gets exhausting and its just no fun. so during the wedding, i may have been a little distant to him. i meant to, the whole sit with me, talk to me, go here with me-thing was getting old, but i did promise to hang around san fran before my flight left on tuesday morning. i kept my promise. we walked the wharf, had breakfast, walked some more. it was nice, but he said something to me as he dropped me off at the airport that really bothered me. he said "sorry if i hurt you or was annoying". it totally took me by surprise. i was like "what? what are you talking" about and he kinda just fidgeted and was like "oh you know, i'm just saying". i just hope that in trying to distance myself i wasn't a complete asshole. i probably was.
anyway, feeling crabby and just wanting to get home, when i checked in the lovely counter people told me my flight was oversold and i had a MIDDLE SEAT. now i fly all the time and when i fly i'm window or aisle. never MIDDLE. i was livid but there was nothing i could do. i almost gave myself an anxiety attack sitting there thinking about how i was going to make it through 5 hours with my 'tude sitting in that middle seat. fortunately, i sat next to some very lovely women. the lady to my left (on the aisle) was a lesbian writer - the only reason i know this is because when she saw i was reading a book, she gave me a bookmark with an advertisement for her latest book on it. when i find it, i'll post the title and her name. she was on her way to the Atlanta Queer Writer's Festival. She was lovely in every way.
I'm a first impressions kind of gal, so when i saw the lady that would be sitting on my right, i was like great, am i going to pass out from the smell of patchouli? when i say she dressed crazy, i'm not doing her justice. she was wearing sock shoes, tights, clam diggers, a skirt over top that and then some crazy patchwork shirt and a very furry scarf. she had long, wild salt and pepper hair. this woman had to have been a hippie - think "free spirited" and you've pictured this woman. she also happened to be a writer - a poet. in fact, atlanta knows her as the dancing poet - i don't doubt that at all.
so when we landed we all exchanged pleasantries and went on our way. i'm really glad these ladies were my travelling companions. seriously, i would have had a panic attack.

okay, here it is

i'm just going to say it.
i'm going to say the thing you should not say.
i'm going to say it because its how i feel and i don't want anyone telling me not to feel that way or feel sorry for me or pity me or whatever.
i really honestly feel like the demise of my last 2 psuedo boyfriend/dates/relationships/whateverthehellyouwanttocallit was in part due to my weight gain/problem. in fact, i know it was part of what went down with tony. i'm looking at some recent pictures and i am not happy at all. i have been beating myself up about this for awhile now. it feels good to let it out.
i went to the gym tonight. no, i don't think that one night is going to help me any, but if i'm consistent - like i used to be - and if i eat like i used to...maybe...MAYBE i can work my way back. now i realize that life isn't all about male attention, but i am SICK of feeling ugly. i don't go out anymore because i am no longer cute. i am older now, i've put on a lot of weight, things that used to be tight are jiggly. i can't tell you the last dude that paid attention to my fatass, but i remember a time when they did and yes, it felt really good. don't we all like that attention? so until i can get back to that place, i need to keep myself indoors and/or working out.
REMEMBER - i don't want any comments on this. i'm just thinking out loud.

this dude is ugly

you guys know i read celebrity blogs like dlisted and perez...though i must say i have a growing distaste for perez. not because he makes fun of people, but because he thinks he's a celebrity too. ANYWAY...these blogs cannot shut up about the dude that plays the lead in the new twilight movie. i haven't read the books, but i plan to and it sucks that now i envision this dude. i think he's ugly. i mean i would see him on the street and think he's ugly.
ew.

Thursday, October 16th 2008

Robert Pattinson Has Magical Hair

Robert Pattinson is one of the stars in that "Twilight" movie. I only know this because a few crazy fangirls have sent me e-mails filled with CAPS and lots of exclamation points demanding that I spread the word about their new god. A god with magical hair. I'm not even sure what his face looks like because my eyes are hypnotized by the unicorn forest on top of his head.

Oh, how I want to frolic naked through his hair. I want to have a picnic lunch on top of his scalp before taking a nap on the top of one of his strands. I won't have to worry about anything hurting me, because nothing gets past his wondrous jungle. He's tried to cut it in the past, but the scissors break whenever they touch one of his precious hairs. And when he takes a shower, the water beads bounce off his mop. His hair will outlive us all.

sunday, october 12 & monday october 13

before going to sleep, Ir had come in to chat with M and I. she and her fiancee had planned some sort of dinner, but M and i were so tired from our voyage to the west coast, we passed out early. we did promise to join Ir at the spa at 9am for mudbaths. Ir seemed really surprised and pleased by this - we (M, P and i) were surprised by this since its customary for the girls to do something girly before the wedding day, plus none of us had had mudbaths before. it would be something fun to do.

not being used to california time, M and I woke up at 5am, california time, which is 8am atlanta time. we watched tv some, napped some, it was awful being awake when everyone else was asleep. Ir came to our room and we all walked over to the spa. now i should mention that all weekend we were either dressed or in these cream colored long huge spa robes. everyone staying at indian springs in calistoga wears these things. i don't normally walk around in my robe, let alone walk from spa to pool to room (which in total is 2 blocks) in it, but it became second nature to all of us.

the mudbath was interesting. first, its $85. second, you are completely naked during the whole thing. first, you take off all your clothes and put your robe on. one of the spa attendents leads you to this area where there are 4 concrete "containers" full of black mud. you take a shower before you get in. then, in front of everyone, butt ass naked, you sit on the ledge of the mud container, lay down on top of the mud (which is very thick and warm) and you flop yourself down. the attendent then takes handfuls of mud and plops a handful on each breast, then each of your legs, your stomach and then slathers it on you. then you sit for about 12 minutes in the mud. i am glad that we all four of us knew one another, as i don't think i could have been naked in front of a stranger for so long. after your 12 minutes, you are helped out of the container, into the shower. after the shower, you are taken to a clawfooted tub full of warm/hot water, where you sit for 10 minutes sipping the spa's signature cucumber/lemon water (delicious by the way!). then into the steam room for as long as you can stand it (which, for me and Ir, was not long) and then to a personal "stall" with a bed for a nap.

would i do it again? no, but i am glad i did it. honestly, i thought we were going to be in the mud for longer. meh. afterwards, Ir and i went to the "buddha pond" (which is just a relaxing area to go after your spa treatments. there is a buddha statue and a small pond, but it wasn't anything spectacularly spiritual). we sat there some and then she and i went back to the hotel, as there was a Georgian picnic (her family is from Georgia the country, not Georgia the state) at 2:30.

the picnic was crazy. Ir's parents are A W E S O M E. i've always been very fond of them. they brought in authentic Georgian food and we all sat around, talked and drank our asses off. parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends....everybody. such a good time. the picnic was out in the area behind our hotel rooms where there is a bocce court and a ping pong table, so we all challenged one another to several games. around 9pm (seven and a half drinking hours later), we all decide to go to the pool.

during the day, the pool is supposed to be a relaxing area for the guests of indian springs. it is an amazing spot. the water is very warm, almost hot, as it is fed by the resort's geyser. its truly a mineral pool. you can't drink or smoke anywhere near it. when it gets dark (9pm dark) you'd expect, those that are looking to relax to be in bed and not be bothered by the 30+ drunk, rowdy people (keep in mind we are all guests of the hotel too) coming in.

Ir, M, A and i are in the pool, swimming and talking and some lady comes over to us telling us that the pool is supposed to be a relaxing area for families, not intended for our foul mouths and disrespect. (honestly, i didn't even realize there was anyone else in the pool, let alone people with 12 year olds). it wasn't that she came over that made me upset, it was that she chose to use the same profanity she asked us to stop using to make her point. she was just so rude. i left shortly thereafter - before some 15 other people came - and went to bed.

monday, october 13: wedding day!

have i mentioned the weather yet? no? well its freezing in the morning in calistoga. FREEZING. the previous day, i'd gone walking along the Calistoga strip and bought myself a hat and a fleece (which i slept in) and i was still cold. now i know for next time: you need to pack winter clothes for the morning.

the previous day, Ir had asked me to be at the ceremony/reception site early (noon) to take pictures as part of her bridal party (she only had one bridesmaid, the maid of honor) and to help her get ready. i got ready at the hotel and rode over to the site with her father and brother. when i got to area where all the girls were getting ready, she was frantic, stressed, bitchy, you name it. i thought i'd seen my share of divas, but Ir can diva with the best of them. for real. finally, she liked her hair and her makeup (both of which i'd contributed to) and we went for pictures.

the ceremony itself was lovely. it is hard to describe the setting, but i did like that they faced us the entire time, the reverend was the one with his back to us. i thought we were going to see a few tears from the groom, but he held it in. the entire thing was very sweet. and of course, i cried.

the dinner was in this really cool cave room. literally a cave. it was almost sinister, but very cool. here is the wedding site: Hans Fahden

then there was your typical dancing to cheesy wedding music, a piece of (orange) wedding cake and throwing of the bouquet (which Ir managed to launch into the lighting fixture where it got stuck).

i took the shuttle bus home afterwards. i don't think i was the only one. i was just so exhausted. i needed to get up at 6am the next day and by this time, my body had made the adjustment to PST.

friday, october 10 and saturday, october 11: journey to napa valley

i took a half day on friday because i hadn't gotten anything done that i needed to before leaving for california. i left work around 1pm and went to the mall. i'm not sure if its that i'm unhappy with my body or if i haven't seen anything worth buying, but i ended up with plain black dress. i bought some shoes to go with the dress, but didn't end up wearing them. return. in spite of having a good talk with the boss about the economy, i'm still not too anxious to part with my money.

afterwards, i went to get a badly needed pedicure at the place KM used to take me to in buckhead. pedicurists (is that a word?) always marvel at my feet. first, i have some weird toes. if you haven't seen them already, you're just going to have to trust me on this, because i am not going to show you. second, my feet are super flat. SUPER. no arches. none. and i happen to have really smooth feet - perhaps this was God's way of making the ugly feet bearable. well the lady doing my feet says that in her culture, wide feet are lucky. i thought she was sweet to say so, but they don't feel very lucky to me.

i went home afterwards, completely exhausted and started packing. packing usually isn't an issue with me, but it took me HOURS to do it this last time. and i didnt' even wear half of what i packed. i also didn't pack enough pants and jackets - napa/sonoma/calistoga area in the morning? FREEZING...

saturday, october 11:

since i didn't finish packing the night before, i got up early (6am early) to take a shower, get ready, pack some more. my flight was supposed to leave at 10:05. it didn't leave until 1:30. here's how it went down...
the flight was scheduled for an on-time departure. in fact, by 10:05, we were all on the plane, waiting to back out of the gate, but we sat there for 45 minutes. as soon as the pilot backs up he stops and rolls back into the gate. why? because he "felt something". apparently one of the brake disks was loose. so he had the maintenance team look at it. they approved us for takeoff 15 minutes later. but this made me really uneasy. the last time i'd heard about brake problems on a plane, that plane eventually crashed and burned everyone alive in spain. so of course i called my mom and told her i loved her. you never know...

when we finally got into a queue for take-off, we were sitting there for another 30 minutes before the pilot decides to give up his spot in line to go to the next terminal over to take off. how does that make sense? why wouldn't use just stay in line? i say this because as soon as we got to the other terminal, we had to wait in line again....until 1:30. by this time, i was sitting on a plane for 3.5 hours and had another 5 to go on the way to San Francisco. Not to mention i had a lady with a baby sitting next to me. The kid was cute, but was really restless. I couldn't really sleep (not that i can sleep on planes normally, but i do try) because the kid kept fussing, jumping into my lap, patting my leg. blah. finally! F I N A L L Y we land.

A (dude that has known Ir since high school) was on my flight - which was great because he was also the dude that rented the car (napa is a 2 hour ride from san francisco). M (my roommate for the weekend) was waiting for us when we got there. i apologized for being late, but it turns out her flight, which left atlanta around the same time, was delayed too - though her pilot managed to get her there an hour before us.

starving and cranky we went for food at TGI Friday's. airport food. i found out at this meal that A is really cheap. i ordered an app to share, a drink and a salad. they both ate the app. i was prepared to pay for it, but i think common courtesy dictates you should at least offer to pay some of it if you eat an app someone else has ordered. No offers from A. this wouldn't be the first time i noticed.

so we hop into our rented Cobalt and make our way to the 101 (north). A drives because I can't (remember my fear of the highway, well its back and the way A drives, it might be worse now) and M had been drinking while waiting for us. nearly three hours later we arrive at Indian Springs

After settling into our rooms/hotels, we head to downtown Calistoga (in Napa Valley), which is kinda like the Highlands, only more ranchey, 60's californiaey. we eat at a place called checkers (not what you think), an italian place and basically sit and eat in silence. all of us are tired from our journey. we're hungry, but we're also sleepy, so we eat and then go back to our rooms to sleep.

first

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CRAY-Z AND HGH!
<3 lola

hot soup and warm, soft bread

mmmmmmm carbs.
this morning i woke up and for a moment i thought it was still the previous evening. it was dark and cold. i'd taken nyquil before going to bed because i think i may be coming down with something, but i didn't give myself enough time for it to wear off so i REALLY didn't want to get out of bed. i almost fell asleep in the shower and again while putting on my pantyhose. if you'd pushed me onto a bed, i probably would have stayed there. the only reason i came in is because i am going over a report with some clients at 4, but i'm out after that.
so anyway, being semi-sick and lazy and fat and PMSing, it was incredible that i even made it to the gym last night, but i did. i got on the bike for 30 minutes and the sauna for 15. don't give me that look - at least i made an appearance.
i have been on a mission to find good workout earphones (a) because i can't seem to find the ones i have (which aren't all that great) and (b) because every set of headphones i've had just plain suck. so after the gym, i went to walmart. i left $98 later...how did i manage to do this? i'll tell you (because i know you're bored):
1. when you walk into wal-mart you all of a sudden remember you need things...i can't explain this phenomenon - it happens in target too. upon walking in, i veered left into the beauty/medicine aisles...this is always bad. i picked up earplugs (they've been quiet over at diesel lately, but i am not taking chances), razors (not sure i needed these), nivea soft (packaging), dayquil and nyquil (i feel like i keep buying these two never knowing if i ran out of the previous batch).
2. after leaving the beauty/medicine aisles, i passed the clothes aisles on my way to the food aisles. now normally, you don't stop in the clothes aisles at walmart, but i was intrigued by what i saw. i found to the max...at walmart! to the max is the cheapest Max Azria (BCBG, Herve Leger) line. i picked up a dress and a cardigan type thing but later left the cardigan because it had some sort of stain on it. the selection was impressive. i didn't confirm that it was actually max azria until this morning after some investigative work - you know Max Azria is not going to admit his clothes are being sold at Walmart, so convieniently, To The Max has been renamed BCBGeneration at all major department stores where To The Max was previously sold. please. the designs are still Max Azria and the fact you don't openly admit to being in Walmart (no verbiage on any of the collateral about who the designer was) is LAME. at least Norma Kamali stands by her clothes. not that it stopped me from buying the dress. $24 weeeeeeeee!
3. so after picking up my dress, i went over to the food aisles because i needed yogurt, cheese and lean cuisine (gross)
4. finally made it over to electronics where i picked up 2 cheap pairs of headphones. using the first one now. not impressed. and the mission continues...
so yeah, $98 later, i was on my way.
nice.

i met someone today

after i returned the $50 headphones from target, i headed over to publix in atlantic station to pick up a turkey sub. i told myself if one of the tables in the front was open after i'd paid for my meal, i'd sit outside and enjoy the weather and take a break. normally i eat at my desk and rush through lunch - not taking time to enjoy my food or my personal time. well, as luck would have it, one of the tables was free, so i sat and ate my sandwich and flipped through Shape magazine.
about 15 minutes into my lunch, a big black woman comes up to me and asks to share my table. i say "of course" and move my things to accommodate. i've never really shared tables with someone before - but if you ask to share a table with someone who is clearly reading, do you talk to them?
i don't know what the etiquette is here, but the woman would not stop talking. i might have been more tolerant had she asked me about my day or how i was doing or asked for my name, but this lady went on and on and onandonandonandon about her day, her interview, her aching feet, how tired she was blahblahblah. i would look up from my magazine and nod my head and smile every once in awhile, but she didn't seem to grasp that i was reading and wanted to be left alone. finally, i had to pack up and leave. lady and her incessant talking got on my nerves.
let me say that i can totally see my mother doing this to someone - which is why i don't want to hate on this woman for too long. my mom will make conversation with just about anyone. at any time, invited or uninvited. its just her way.... i'm sure it was this lady's too, but it was SUPER annoying.

weekend update

...i had fun sleeping outdoors with a group of great people....
not so fun, the weight i must have gained eating all that pizza...and then eating mexican the next day....
my body is in desperate need of detox in the form of good food and workouts...don't want to show up in napa all oompa loompa. blah

FAIL

so if you are one of these freaks that watched the debate last night and thought Palin "won" or did really well then...
WE ARE NO LONGER FRIENDS!
WHAT THE HELL DEBATE WERE YOU WATCHING?
CAUSE THE ONE I WAS WATCHING - SHE DIDN'T ANSWER ANY OF THE QUESTIONS DIRECTED TO HER.
SHE WINKED!
THAT FUCKING VOICE.
GOOD GRIEF

this is amazing

thank jennifer connelly

for my interest in balenciaga. i think i was the only one that didn't think she looked ridiculous wearing balenciaga 2008 spring/summer ready-to-wear....

photography, David Sims

i think she looked hot.
i also happen to like balenciaga's 2009 S/S RTW collection:

photo: marcio madeira

Happy October

so i've decided - ENOUGH.
a new month is good enough reason to let go of past hangups and start fresh.
so..
Happy October!

Cray-Z

i was hungry on my way home last night, so i stopped by Alon's pick up a salad, but they were closed (GUH), so I ended up getting a small YOFORIA. i had a shit day yesterday, but somehow, YOFORIA made it all good. thank you, YOFORIA.

so then, still hungry, i made a mofo lean cuisine (if you don't know why i'm calling lean cuisine mofo, ask me, i will tell you my conspiracy theory) when i got home, hopped into bed, and read some more chapters of The Watchmen. I haven't finished it yet, but I'm telling you now, it's one I know I'll recommend.

So then I took a nap and got up around 9pm, tooled around for a bit, put on my gym clothes, went to the gym ran, biked, came back home, watched letterman, went to sleep....here's where it gets good.


so on thursday, mama C is throwing a "video card" party for her dad's 60th birthday (long story short, he lives in England and she is having a get together to send him a happy birthday video. such a cute idea. if i liked my dad, i would consider doing this for him, but i don't really, so the idea is out. ANYWAY. when she sent out an email about it yesterday, i replied saying "IN! I'll bring the party hats" - and I meant it. I think is a cute touch. Well, last night I had this dream about going to a party store with mama C and she's all being mean to me about my party hat selection. so i give up and i ask her "what kind of party hat do you want?" and she pulls out this ugly knitted cone thing..... she must not have liked that i laughed my ass off at her selection because she kicked me out of the store...

i'm not sure how the first dream melted into the second one, it must have because i never woke up last night... but the second one i get a knock at the door while Tony (god! yes i know, of all people to be stuck in my subconscious) is in the shower. it's S. he's wearing the iPod i gave him and he says he's brought me back the last of my things (well over 2 years later). so i go downstairs to the parking lot and sitting there is a dresser he must have gotten me from the thrift store (he used to buy me things all the time from the thrift store) along with some other things that, did i not think he was the anti-christ, i might have kept. however, feeling above his stupid game, i say "i don't want any of that" and proceed to throw it all in the trash. he's just standing there watching me do it and on my way back up the stairs i start wondering how in the hell he'd gotten over to my apartment given he has no car. as soon as i complete this thought, i see E come out of the drivers side of an old chevy bronco. she goes over to him to console him (apparently he is not happy at my reaction) and she's all crying to get him to come home with her and just forget the whole incident. he doesn't drop it and follows me up to the apartment to yell at me (typical). we're standing there, me in my apartment at the front door and him on the doorstep yelling when finally i shut the door in his face. he doesn't take kindly to this and starts beating on the door. so i start threatening him with" go away or you're going to make me very angry and i may say things you don't want heard", but he doesn't stop and finally i blurt out "E he has cheated on you, with me, repeatedly, while you have been together". then the door beating stops and its quiet until you hear E let out a scream and suddenly my door turns to glass, so i can see her running back to her car yelling at S that she won't ever forgive or talk to him again. I'm pleased with myself for causing this chaos but suddenly start to feel bad for the girl but before i can form another thought, S is running back up the stairs with an axe and starts breaking the glass door with it. he gets me and slices part of my arm (i'm not sure what happens to Tony at this point, no sign of him. again, typical). and i'm running around the apartment frantically trying to find a way out. i climb out the window and hang out on the ledge for awhile until S is gone.
thats it, there is no more - but you gotta admit - that is a LOT.